Saturday, August 23, 2008

One fine day in Germany

It was the third day of my stay in germany. I was leaving for the office at 8. I had a meeting with Mrs Kuhn for my application of residence permit. Just as I was about to leave, I thought of asking something to my neighbour Rohith. Without removing the key off the lock, I went out and knocked at his door. Just then I heard a noise. I went to my door and I knew the reason. The door had slam shut with my key inside. It was then I noted one important feature of the door. The knob from outside cannot be turned. So by all means I can't enter inside. Gladly, I was ready for the office. So I thought maybe I will call up the owner of the apartment and get the spare key from him. Its not a big issue anyway.

I was walking to the stop when I saw Mitra and Anju. I was smiling for what had just happened.

Mitra: Some thing happened?
Me: Yea. I locked the door with my key inside.
Mitra: Appa, what are u going to do.
Me: Dont worry i have everything under controll. I ll call the owner and get the spare key. Its not of a big deal.
Anju: You shud have taken care.(I hate when some one says that...I didnt know that was going to happen)

Mrs Kuhn had come we did all the formalities. She had agreed to drop us at the office. While she was driving she got a call from her daughter. They had an animated talk in german. After the call she turned to me.

Kuhn: It always happens that people come from India lock their keys inside the room(what a coincidence. Did she knew it was coming?)
Me: What?
Kuhn: One of your bosch collegues locked their keys inside
Me: What is the big deal about it?. You can get a spare key and open it.
Kuhn: Its not simple as it seems. The guy had put the key in the lock and it got shut.
Me: So?
Kuhn: So, the problem is since the key is in the lock, the spare key wont go in.
Me: Huh?
Kuhn: Yes, so we call a locksmith and break open the lock
Me: (smiling): Thats great.
(I heard Mitra and Anju gasping)
Mitra: So they will break open the door.
Kuhn: And they will charge you 70 euros
(This is getting better)
Kuhn: This amount is not re-imbursed since it is your fault. So be careful while you close the door.
Me: I ll keep that in mind

We 3 were walking towards the office

Mitra: Where did u keep the key?
Me: Dont worry. Everything is under control. The key is safe in the lock
Mitra: So they will have to break open the lock.
Me: It seems so
Mitra: 70 Euros???
Me: Yea. i know. Dont remind me of tat

Around 3 I thought I shud call the owner. His sekt picked up the call.

Me: I have locked my key inside.
Sekt: Please come before 6 in the evening. We will provide the spare key

I reached the place by 5:30. It was then i was aware of another crucial problem. I didnt know where the office was. Anyway I had the address with me. So nothin to worry about. I ll also do a little bit of exploration. I started a bit of exploration.
5:40
5:45
5:50

Now i am starting to panic. I went around the corner of a building, when I saw a german lady who was about to close the shop.

Me: Hi, Can u tell me where this place is??
Lady: Ahh, jacobgasse....(she went into deep thoughts)
Me :well?
Lady:#$%$^%^&$%&#^$%^#%@%@%@$%@@@@@@@%#
Me: Can you speak in english??
Lady: (she started showing direction with her hands. I was able to read from her face that she didnt even know such a place existed)#$#$%^%&^*^$#%$%%@#
Me: Thanks for the information. That was relly helpful
I set out acording to her directions. Still no luck. I looked at my watch 5:55. If i dont find the place in 5 mins i dont know where am I going to sleep today. Suddenly i remembered Kavi's advice that it was near Norris bank. Keeping my fingers crossed, I went near it and took the way opposite to it, and there it was.

Finally, I entered the office.

I couldnt see Drauz but there was this cute little girl in her early twenties. She was beautiful and also had good statistics. Maybe my stars are shining bright today.

Me: Hi, My name is Tony. I had called before for the key of apartment no:21
She: Ein und zwanzig????
(Oh oh...here we go again)
Me: Ja bitte.
She:#%$%@$%^%&^*&**#^#
(I got the feeling that she was asking me to return the key immediately after opening it)
Me: yea, sure.

So I ran to my room so that maybe i can get a glimpse of her before she leaves the office at 6.
I put the key in the lock. Drats, It wont budge. I ran back.
Me: Its not opening
She: Was???(means what in german)
Me: Key is in the other side of the lock. So it wont open
(I could see the confused look in her face )
Me: The door NICHT OFFNEN....
She: Ohh....(She handed me another key.)#$%$%$^&%^*&^*&
Me: Yea, I ll try with this one.
(I again ran back and tried with no luck. So i went back to the office)
Me:Nope.. its not working. Can you call Drauz??. Its better I talked to him(He knows english)
She: Drauz, busy.#%$%#^%^$%&^&%^&^%#@
Me:Look...this is not going to work out. I ll call Drauz.
(But she wont allow me)
I came up with an idea.
I pointed to a door next to her
ME: This is door. My key this side in. Your key the other side in. Both keys together. NICHT OFFNEN.
I think she got the idea. She said she will come with me. Fine. That is some improvement. She took a bunch of keys and came to my apartment and tried opening the door. I knew it wont. So I simply stood there smiling. Now the gravity of the situation began to dawn upon her. We went back to the office and finally she called up Drauz. The old man is of 55 yrs and was on a date with some lady. He didnt like the interruption. She talked to him in german. Then she handed the phone to me
Drauz: Tony. You put the key in the lock. Its a big problem.
Me: I know.
Drauz: I ll do something. Give the phone to the lady

Again some animated talk between them. Then she hung up the fone. She was dissapointed. Mebbe she had some plans after 6. And I came up as a spoil sport.
She was thinking abt what to be done.
ME: Big problem????
She:(smiled): ja

She said some thing which felt like come with me.

So I followed her to the locksmith's place. Again some talk in german. He asked abt the person to whom this will be billed. She told her name. It was like Get..... I havent heard some thing like that before. We went back to my room and waited. The guy came up with his tools. He jammed a spring like tool between the lock and behold, the door is open. An expression of relief in everyone's face.

I turned towards the girl
Me: Thank you
She:(was in a hurry)Tschus. (and she left)

I looked at the time 6:45. I was caught with this guilty feeling. I was with her for around an hour and I couldnt even ask her name. For the first time in my life I felt bad about passing the german language exams with moderation. I thought of apologising to my german teacher. Maybe I should do the next course soon. Anyways, i felt like having a beer. So I went out, this time with the key in my hand. I went to the nearest super market. I saw some cigarettes. It was then I remembered that knapps had told me about this particular cigarette called west silver. Was it to try it or not to??. I am not sure. But the name remained in my mind. It was then i noticed that the cigarettes were kept in an iron cage. I tried thinking of ways how to open it and started scratching the packets inside.

Lady:(startled me) May I help u(with a german mix)?
ME: Yea. I would like to have that. West Silver
Lady: ok. (She started to open...then a pause)How old are you?
Me:(Do i look younger than 18. Anyways its good. I smiled) 24
Lady: Ok.

She took the packet:
Lady: anything else??
Me: Ok ill buy a dishwash liquid and a scrubber. Just wait...
Lady nodded
When I got those i came back to the counter. Then rememebered another important thing. Cigaratte lighter

Me: Do you have a cigarette lighter???
LAdy: Was??
(Shit. Now what am I going to say. I tried to show some symbols with my hand but nothing was sinking in to her. God, I will have to use my german again. I paid my respects to my german teacher Mr Mahajani. I knew the required word started with F)
Me: Do you have Flug?
Lady: Flug???
Me: beg?
Lady(half smile): Beg?
Me: Leiterin???
Lady: Was?
Me: Flugbegleiterin???
LAdy (Half smile, half frown) : WAS??????
(Damn. If that was not the german word for lighter then what was the meaning of this word....oh shit...it means airhostess)
Me(Frantically): Nicht Nicht

Me:FeuerZeug(finally i got it)
Lady: Ohh....that is in the other side.
Me: Thank you
I came back home. What a day it was. And i took a resolution

I am going to take german seriously

PS: I was asked for the rent of this month. Still no extra cost for opening the door :D



3 comments:

kitty said...

hey tonic....dis was not as gud as first one..i likd de hw xplained ur situatn to dat lady...[This is door. My key this side in. Your key the other side in. Both keys together. NICHT OFFNEN.]made me remind my frnd apeksha she is gujju and we went for shopping and she wanted to buy a belt buckle for her father...she had a problem lik dis she culdnt convey it in malyalam...she askd him"mathram ethra???"showin de piece...but there was a huge crowd startd laughin at her....it happens whn ur out of station
try to learn the language properly........

Anonymous said...

.. you missed out the important part.. did you like West Silver? :D

and I'm not surprised you did all this, I was expecting more.. keep writing, 'Mandanmaar Londonil' stories iniyum varummenna pratheekshayode.. ;)

Abhinav Viswambharan said...

shucks man...after i read this i kind of get a itchy feeling - how the hell could i miss out reading this post of yours...chehhh...

Dey, nee enneyum kadathi vettumallo...i laughed out loud a couple of times while reading this post, so much so that Johns came from the room asking me what was I laughing for... : D

Hope that, once you are back from Germany, you would be careful with keys, unlike before...when you lost us almost 3-4 keys... Grrr... ;(