My experiments with lies. Part II

It is quite evident that that once you start lying, parents start loosing faith in you. They start to doubt every word he says. But parents want to believe their kids always. I used to take advantage of this fact.

It was a normal day. Me and my friends were playing cards at ulpans room near to college. We used to call it as Ulpan mukku. That shows how much we cared abt Ulpan. Whenever we feel bored of the class we would bunk classes and play cards at Ulpan mukku. It was at the end of the third game, KK came with the idea. We all looked to him. On second thoughts it had been a while since we had gone for a trip together. We knew we wanted a break.

Dicku: Where to?

Moolan: Why dont you guys come to my farm house in palakkad?

Nav: Seems like a good idea.

Me: The exams are coming soon, so I dont think my parents would agree to that.

Ray: That is not a problem for you. You can find an excuse.

KK: Even i have the same problem with my parents, I need to find some excuse too.

So we decided to go for the trip on one Saturday and come back in the coming Monday because the study holidays were going on. Now it was time for me to say another lie.

That day in the evening, mom was cooking the dinner. I went there casually

Me: Mom, It seems Ulpans sisters marriage is fixed.

Mom: Aha, Never knew Ulpan had a sis. What is she doing?

Me: (Even i am not sure about that). Her name is Renjini. She completed here Msc in chemistry.

Mom: Thats great. When is the marriage?

Me: It is this sunday

Mom: So soon?

Me: Its like he knew the fact long before. But he didnt tell us.

Mom: So when are you going

Me: Its in palakkad. So we are planning to leave on saturday early morning. Will roam around there on saturday and attend the marriage on sunday. Hopefully will back by sunday morning

Mom: So who all are going?

Me: Me, KK Dicku,Ulpan,moolan, nav, ray, mammad, reveesh

Mom: Is Ulpan also comin with you??.

Me: (Oops) Nope. I just said his name casually. Coz we are the gang. Anyways since we have to go early morning on saturday we are planning to spend the night at ray's house. It would be good for us since his parents are back in Saudi.

Mom: Ok Fine. Get the permission from your dad.

Me: Can you ask him for me?

Mom: Ok.

One hour later

Dad: So all of you are planning to go for Ulpans sis marriage eh?

Me:Yea, Its on sunday

Dad: I hope you still remember that the model exams are coming up. If you go for trip, you should make it up in your studies in the coming days. I am letting you go because its and important function

Me: I understand

The next friday evening:

Mom came to my room for packing my stuff for the two days trip. She knew that I would pack only in the last 5 mins. She wanted to do things in a more calm way. I was playing a computer game

Mom: So you are leaving today at nine?

Me: yep

Mom: So whats the name of ulpans would be brother in law?

Me: eh? Suresh

Mom: So what does he do?

Me: hmm...He is a software engineer in infosys

Mom: So how does he look like?

(This cant go on, I should put an end to this)

Me: (with a smug smile)Ulpan didnt show me his foto when they fixed his marriage.

Mom: If you talk to me like that, i am not going to ask you aything.

Me: (Better). Dont ask

Mom: Ok Fine. I am leaving

Me:(Thank God)

We reached palakkad by 11 in the morn. Had the break fast. An went to moolans farm house. We had a nice time there till evening till we heard the news that it was a harthal on monday. Hearing about the harthal Mammad sprang into action. He wanted to reach home on sunday so that he can avoid the harthal. Since he was so adamant about reaching home on sunday, we also changed our plans. So we started back on saturday night. We reached Ernakulam by late night. So we decided to sleep over at Rays house.

When I woke up in the morn every one was planning to go to their places. So I also started back home

I reached the gate, when I saw mom sitting on a chair there.

Mom: So you are back early?

I: I actually got things confused. The marriage was on saturday. Since it was harthal the next day we had to cut the trip in palakkad so that we can reach here one day early

(I could see the that my mom was not smiling. It was a rather stern look. But how will my plan fail)

Mom: Anyway Dad is waiting for you in the kitchen

Me: Ok. Fine

I went straight away to the kitchen where are saw Dad was cutting some tomatoes.

Dad: So you are back early?

Me: Yea, because of the harthal.

(He stopped what he was doing and looked straight to me)

Dad: So exactly where did you go?

Me: I went to Palakkad

(The action was swift. The next thing i could remember was he holding me against the wall with one hand on my neck and the other hand holding a knife menacingly. The distance between hte place where he was sitting and me was around 10 mts. I still havent got the faintest idea how he covered the distance so fast )

Dad(voice raised with anger): Where did you go?

Me: I went to palakkad. This is the truth.

(Then I realised going to Palakkad was the only truth in my story)

Dad: Ok, then why did u go there?

Me: (I had no option) : We went for a fun trip.

(He took his hand off my neck)

Dad: The next time you lie to me will be your last one. Get out of my sight

I couldnt understand how did things come out. But I needed to find out. Mom was still keeping her stern face and wouldnt talk to me. I waited the rest of the day in my room. Mom temper had softened a bit. So I approached her cautiously

Me: How did you come to know about our Palakkad trip?

Mom: Moolans uncle told us that you went to enjoy in Palakkad

(Still it dosent make much sense. Why should Moolans uncle come into the picture. Dad has even met him. And he wont call anyone just to ask about my whereabouts)

I went to coll the day after the harthal. I spotted Dicku. I told him whether his parents had found anything about the trip.

Dicku: I have some thing to tell to you.

Me: What?

Dicku: It was my Mom who called to your home.

Me: Why should she do that. You told me that she wont ever call to my house.

Dicku: I can explain what happened.

After he explained what happened at his place, things started to dawn upon me. Till that I only had heard about butterfly theory, but never imagined such a situation can happen in real life.

Now comes a new charecter in my story. Balu

Balu is a guy of my same batch. The problem starts when he also decides to go on a trip to Vagamon on the same day. As an explanation to get out of his house he told his Mom that he was going for a combined study at Dicku's house. That same night Balu got drunk and had to sleep over at his friends house. His Mom got tensed. She called Dicku's Mom

Balus Mom: Do you know why Balu is home yet. He had come there for a combined study

Dicku's Mom: No, I dont know about Balu. But Dicku told me that he will be going for maths combine study at tonys house.

After ending the call, the old headmistress woke inside her(Since she was the head mistress of the sacred heart coll, she knew things were not as it seemed).She tried on his cell. But we were out of range. So she called to my house.

Dicku's Mom: Is Dicku there. I need to talk to him. He told me that he will be there for combined study.

Dad: No, he is not here. Infact Tony went for his friends Sis marriage.

Dicku's Mom: Ok. Then I ll try on his cell phone later. Thanks.

(She hung up the phone. But the damage. Dad had got a scent of things. He called up at Moolans house)

Dad: Do you know where Tony and Moolan is?

Moolan's Uncle: They have gone to enjoy in Palakkad.

(So thats how things turned out ugly. But I still had some unclear points)

Me: So what happened to Balu?

Dicku: After his Mom called my Mom, she again tried on Balus cell. He told her that he came to my house and since I wasnt there he went Anurag's house. So he didnt have much problems.

Me: And what happened with you?

Dicku: Do you remember me getting a call in the morning we were in Palakkad. It was my Mom. She told me that you had gone for some marriage and asked about my whereabouts. I told her that since you were not in your house, I went to KK's house for combined study. And she took that. Moreover she didnt have KK's telephone number

(I should have thought of this situation might happen. But it was a far guess. No one could see that coming.)I took a walk to the college ground and sat on one of the benches. Some seniors were playing football.

I heard one of them shouting to the other one

“Pottane chetti chathichal, chettiye daivam chathikkum”

One fine day in Germany

It was the third day of my stay in germany. I was leaving for the office at 8. I had a meeting with Mrs Kuhn for my application of residence permit. Just as I was about to leave, I thought of asking something to my neighbour Rohith. Without removing the key off the lock, I went out and knocked at his door. Just then I heard a noise. I went to my door and I knew the reason. The door had slam shut with my key inside. It was then I noted one important feature of the door. The knob from outside cannot be turned. So by all means I can't enter inside. Gladly, I was ready for the office. So I thought maybe I will call up the owner of the apartment and get the spare key from him. Its not a big issue anyway.

I was walking to the stop when I saw Mitra and Anju. I was smiling for what had just happened.

Mitra: Some thing happened?
Me: Yea. I locked the door with my key inside.
Mitra: Appa, what are u going to do.
Me: Dont worry i have everything under controll. I ll call the owner and get the spare key. Its not of a big deal.
Anju: You shud have taken care.(I hate when some one says that...I didnt know that was going to happen)

Mrs Kuhn had come we did all the formalities. She had agreed to drop us at the office. While she was driving she got a call from her daughter. They had an animated talk in german. After the call she turned to me.

Kuhn: It always happens that people come from India lock their keys inside the room(what a coincidence. Did she knew it was coming?)
Me: What?
Kuhn: One of your bosch collegues locked their keys inside
Me: What is the big deal about it?. You can get a spare key and open it.
Kuhn: Its not simple as it seems. The guy had put the key in the lock and it got shut.
Me: So?
Kuhn: So, the problem is since the key is in the lock, the spare key wont go in.
Me: Huh?
Kuhn: Yes, so we call a locksmith and break open the lock
Me: (smiling): Thats great.
(I heard Mitra and Anju gasping)
Mitra: So they will break open the door.
Kuhn: And they will charge you 70 euros
(This is getting better)
Kuhn: This amount is not re-imbursed since it is your fault. So be careful while you close the door.
Me: I ll keep that in mind

We 3 were walking towards the office

Mitra: Where did u keep the key?
Me: Dont worry. Everything is under control. The key is safe in the lock
Mitra: So they will have to break open the lock.
Me: It seems so
Mitra: 70 Euros???
Me: Yea. i know. Dont remind me of tat

Around 3 I thought I shud call the owner. His sekt picked up the call.

Me: I have locked my key inside.
Sekt: Please come before 6 in the evening. We will provide the spare key

I reached the place by 5:30. It was then i was aware of another crucial problem. I didnt know where the office was. Anyway I had the address with me. So nothin to worry about. I ll also do a little bit of exploration. I started a bit of exploration.
5:40
5:45
5:50

Now i am starting to panic. I went around the corner of a building, when I saw a german lady who was about to close the shop.

Me: Hi, Can u tell me where this place is??
Lady: Ahh, jacobgasse....(she went into deep thoughts)
Me :well?
Lady:#$%$^%^&$%&#^$%^#%@%@%@$%@@@@@@@%#
Me: Can you speak in english??
Lady: (she started showing direction with her hands. I was able to read from her face that she didnt even know such a place existed)#$#$%^%&^*^$#%$%%@#
Me: Thanks for the information. That was relly helpful
I set out acording to her directions. Still no luck. I looked at my watch 5:55. If i dont find the place in 5 mins i dont know where am I going to sleep today. Suddenly i remembered Kavi's advice that it was near Norris bank. Keeping my fingers crossed, I went near it and took the way opposite to it, and there it was.

Finally, I entered the office.

I couldnt see Drauz but there was this cute little girl in her early twenties. She was beautiful and also had good statistics. Maybe my stars are shining bright today.

Me: Hi, My name is Tony. I had called before for the key of apartment no:21
She: Ein und zwanzig????
(Oh oh...here we go again)
Me: Ja bitte.
She:#%$%@$%^%&^*&**#^#
(I got the feeling that she was asking me to return the key immediately after opening it)
Me: yea, sure.

So I ran to my room so that maybe i can get a glimpse of her before she leaves the office at 6.
I put the key in the lock. Drats, It wont budge. I ran back.
Me: Its not opening
She: Was???(means what in german)
Me: Key is in the other side of the lock. So it wont open
(I could see the confused look in her face )
Me: The door NICHT OFFNEN....
She: Ohh....(She handed me another key.)#$%$%$^&%^*&^*&
Me: Yea, I ll try with this one.
(I again ran back and tried with no luck. So i went back to the office)
Me:Nope.. its not working. Can you call Drauz??. Its better I talked to him(He knows english)
She: Drauz, busy.#%$%#^%^$%&^&%^&^%#@
Me:Look...this is not going to work out. I ll call Drauz.
(But she wont allow me)
I came up with an idea.
I pointed to a door next to her
ME: This is door. My key this side in. Your key the other side in. Both keys together. NICHT OFFNEN.
I think she got the idea. She said she will come with me. Fine. That is some improvement. She took a bunch of keys and came to my apartment and tried opening the door. I knew it wont. So I simply stood there smiling. Now the gravity of the situation began to dawn upon her. We went back to the office and finally she called up Drauz. The old man is of 55 yrs and was on a date with some lady. He didnt like the interruption. She talked to him in german. Then she handed the phone to me
Drauz: Tony. You put the key in the lock. Its a big problem.
Me: I know.
Drauz: I ll do something. Give the phone to the lady

Again some animated talk between them. Then she hung up the fone. She was dissapointed. Mebbe she had some plans after 6. And I came up as a spoil sport.
She was thinking abt what to be done.
ME: Big problem????
She:(smiled): ja

She said some thing which felt like come with me.

So I followed her to the locksmith's place. Again some talk in german. He asked abt the person to whom this will be billed. She told her name. It was like Get..... I havent heard some thing like that before. We went back to my room and waited. The guy came up with his tools. He jammed a spring like tool between the lock and behold, the door is open. An expression of relief in everyone's face.

I turned towards the girl
Me: Thank you
She:(was in a hurry)Tschus. (and she left)

I looked at the time 6:45. I was caught with this guilty feeling. I was with her for around an hour and I couldnt even ask her name. For the first time in my life I felt bad about passing the german language exams with moderation. I thought of apologising to my german teacher. Maybe I should do the next course soon. Anyways, i felt like having a beer. So I went out, this time with the key in my hand. I went to the nearest super market. I saw some cigarettes. It was then I remembered that knapps had told me about this particular cigarette called west silver. Was it to try it or not to??. I am not sure. But the name remained in my mind. It was then i noticed that the cigarettes were kept in an iron cage. I tried thinking of ways how to open it and started scratching the packets inside.

Lady:(startled me) May I help u(with a german mix)?
ME: Yea. I would like to have that. West Silver
Lady: ok. (She started to open...then a pause)How old are you?
Me:(Do i look younger than 18. Anyways its good. I smiled) 24
Lady: Ok.

She took the packet:
Lady: anything else??
Me: Ok ill buy a dishwash liquid and a scrubber. Just wait...
Lady nodded
When I got those i came back to the counter. Then rememebered another important thing. Cigaratte lighter

Me: Do you have a cigarette lighter???
LAdy: Was??
(Shit. Now what am I going to say. I tried to show some symbols with my hand but nothing was sinking in to her. God, I will have to use my german again. I paid my respects to my german teacher Mr Mahajani. I knew the required word started with F)
Me: Do you have Flug?
Lady: Flug???
Me: beg?
Lady(half smile): Beg?
Me: Leiterin???
Lady: Was?
Me: Flugbegleiterin???
LAdy (Half smile, half frown) : WAS??????
(Damn. If that was not the german word for lighter then what was the meaning of this word....oh shit...it means airhostess)
Me(Frantically): Nicht Nicht

Me:FeuerZeug(finally i got it)
Lady: Ohh....that is in the other side.
Me: Thank you
I came back home. What a day it was. And i took a resolution

I am going to take german seriously

PS: I was asked for the rent of this month. Still no extra cost for opening the door :D

My experiments with lies

Long back, Gandhiji had written a book called “My experiments with truth” in which he had shown to the world the power of truth. One of his stories which touched me most was the incident in which he had stolen a piece of gold from his brother to eat meat. But in the end when Gandhiji confessed to his Dad by writing a letter, his dad cried a lot and tore away the letter (what a man). I have often imagined that what would have happened if I had done the same. The answer is obvious; my dad would have beaten the shit out of me. So the experiment with truth is something which Gandhiji can afford but not me. So I preferred to do experiments with lies rather than truth. At least I have a chance to escape unscratched.
My dad was a person who could lose his temper very soon. Once he loses his temper no one is sure what he is going to do. Some times Mom reminds me how he had thrashed me in two occasions when I was 3 yrs old. One was when I hurled the vacuum cleaner on the floor and it broke into 3 pieces. The other was when I broke the deck of cassette player on the second day it came home. It seems I was an important factor in keeping his temper alive all the time. He knew I was hard as a rock. So I had to bear everything. I wouldn’t complain about it either. Dad grew up in tough conditions and had put a lot of hard work to attain what ever he had attained now. So he was a person who believed that during the time of studies I should only study. His justification was that I could enjoy when I become self reliant. To make things worse I didn’t have many marks during my engineering. But once this part of life is over one can never get it back. And I am not a person who is going to lose it so easily.

About my experiments, I have lied a lot, but two of them were very close incidents which I won’t forget that easily. The first one will be named
Part One which shows my thinking capability and my ability to react in tight situations (Seriously, I am not bragging about myself:-D)

I did my engineering in a famous college or rather school called “Rajagiri School of Engineering and Technology”. As the name suggests it was a school. No bunking classes and fooling around. If classes are bunked, one needs a proper leave letter the next day. One fine Saturday when I was in first year (we had classes on Saturdays too), the session after 12 was cancelled and we were asked to do some reading exercises for the rest of the day. As usual most of the class was not in a mood to study. I, Joey, Thadus and Dicku was planning about what to be done. Joey came up with an idea

J: Let’s go for a Film
D: Well..thats fine. But for which film shall we go?
T: I heard that “The recruit” is a good film. We can go for that
I: That sounds fine

So every thing was fixed. Our college was in a valley. There were no other modes of transportation other than the college bus or private vehicles. Else one have to take a 3 km walk in the scorching sun. We couldn’t go through the front gate coz our HOD
Ramettan would always be on watch. So the 7 of us left for the film. It was a good film and I reached home by 8.
The next Tuesday I heard that Ramettan had taken attendance on Saturday. He was calling the parents of those who were absent. He had called up Joey’s and Thadus parents. They had told their parents the truth, so they didn’t find any difficulties. But my case was different. Since I didn’t get any call till then I thought he might have missed me. So far, so good.

That evening I came back home at 5 and I was having my snacks. My dad and mom was near me talking about general things. I heard the telephone ringing. I was expecting a call from my friend. I picked the phone

Voice from the other side: Hello. Is this the residence of Tony Thomas
I: Yes.
V: Can I speak to someone who is responsible for Tony Thomas
I: Ya sure. One sec
(I could identify that voice even in the worst drunk state. Ramettan had finally called up. A train of thoughts went through my mind about the best action I could follow. Should I change my voice and say that I am Tony’s Dad. But is my voice too deep for that? Any way it’s worth a try. But if the cover is blown then things could become worse. Ok ….I’ll do it).

Dad: Who is on the phone…….
(Crap….what is dad doing here. Plan A is not to going to work out with him standing next to me. Ramettan is also waiting at the other end. No point in cutting the phone. That will make him suspicious. He will call again. What should I do……………………)

I : Its for you dad.
Dad. Who is it.
I: I don’t know.
(With a half smile and a half frown, dad picked the phone from me)

Dad: Hello , Thomas speaking
D:Ahem
Ramettan:…………………………
Dad:Oh
Ramettan:…………………………
Dad: Hmm
Ramettan:…………………………
Dad:Is it so

(I could see the gradual change of dad’s expression of happiness to surprise and anger. An outburst is imminent.)
Dad: Ok, I ll ask him. Thanks for calling. You are doing a good job. Thank you. Bye.

He kept the phone and turned to me.

Dad: Where were you on Saturday evening?
Me: I was at Dicku’s house.(Plan B came from nowhere. If I said about the film then I would have been a goner. So I took a much safer route)

Dad: Who all were there with u there?
I: Joey, KK, Dicku and Thadus. (I added the name of my friend KK coz he was the most intelligent of the lot. He might come up handy)
Dad: Call Joey
I: He wont be there at home now
Dad: Then call Dicku
I: Even he wont be there either.
Dad: Then give me the number. I’ll call their parents.
I: I think Thadus will be at home.
Dad: Then give me the number.
I: I’ll dial the number.
(I punched the numbers. My plan B had a problem. The only person who knew about it was me. I had to convey this to Thadus for the plan to work. If one of his parent’s picks the phone then my cover will be blown. I prayed to God and kept my fingers crossed. I had to act fast. Dad can ask for the receiver any time)
Thadus picked the phone.

I: Hey, Didn’t we go to Dicku’s house on Saturday.
Thadus: Muhahahahahah (I couldn’t hear what he said next because dad had already snatched the receiver from me)

Dad: Where were you all on Saturday Afternoon?
Thadus: ……………………………..
Dad: Why did you go to his house?
(I knew Thadus had got the clue which I had given. Plan B worked)
Dad on phone: See your parents have sent u to the college so that you study hard. They will have a lot of expectations on you. You could have spent the afternoon studying rather than visiting your friend’s house………(The advice went for nearly 5 mins. Thadus could do nothing other than accept everything: D. Dad hung up the phone.)

Dad: Next time when you don’t have classes. You could either spend the time in the library or you can come home directly. Is it clear??

(Mom entered the room)

Mom: What happened?
Dad: He didn’t have classes on sat and he went to Dicku’s house. The HOD had called to inform that he was not in the college that after noon.

Mom: Your HOD is a very sincere person. He always wants the students to follow the right path. If you had gone for a film that day, dad would have killed you.

I: Do you think I’ll ever do that???


**************************END***************************